5 Reasons You Should Do a First Look on Your Wedding Day

Let’s get this out of the way: first looks are not just trendy—they’re transformative. As a Boston wedding photographer who’s seen it all (yes, including the last-minute ring search and the flower girl meltdown), I can confidently say that a first look often becomes one of the most meaningful moments of the entire day.

If you’re on the fence about doing a first look, or you’re not even sure what it is (hey, no shame!), this post will walk you through what it is, why it matters, and why it could be the best decision you make for your wedding day.

So, What Is a First Look?

A first look is a private moment where the couple sees each other before the ceremony. No crowd. No aisle. Just the two of you (and maybe your photographer quietly hiding in the bushes like a stealthy photo ninja). It’s intimate, emotional, and all about connection.

Reason #1: You Get a Real Moment Together

Think about it: the ceremony is beautiful, but it’s also performative in a way. All eyes are on you. You’re standing in front of guests. You’re thinking about your vows, the music cue, whether you’re holding your bouquet correctly.

The first look? It’s just you two. You can hug, cry, kiss, twirl, laugh—whatever feels real in the moment. No time limit. No script. I’ve seen couples breathe a sigh of relief the second they see each other. It’s like the world pauses for a second.

“We didn’t realize how much we needed that pause in the day until we had it. It grounded us.” – L + M

Reason #2: You’ll Have More Photos—and Better Light

This is where the photographer in me gets excited. When you do a first look, we get to start portraits earlier in the day when the light is typically softer (hello, glowy skin and fewer shadows). Plus, you’ll be fresh—hair and makeup still on point, no sweat stains from a summer ceremony (Boston humidity, I’m looking at you).

And bonus: because we knock out most portraits before the ceremony, you actually get to go to cocktail hour with your guests. Yes, you get to eat the mini lobster rolls.

Reason #3: It Calms the Pre-Ceremony Nerves

Even the chillest people can feel anxious before walking down the aisle. That little flutter? Totally normal. A first look helps ground you. You see your person, remind yourself why you’re doing this, and suddenly the day feels doable.

I’ve had grooms who looked like they were going to pass out turn into soft puddles the moment they saw their partner. One bride told me, “I thought I’d be a wreck walking down the aisle, but after our first look, I just felt ready.”

Reason #4: It Gives You Breathing Room in the Timeline

Without a first look, most portraits (wedding party, couple, and sometimes even family) have to be squeezed in between the ceremony and reception. That window can be tight—and trust me, you don’t want to feel rushed when you’re trying to look relaxed and in love.

A first look gives you space. It slows the pace. It makes room for moments that aren’t on a checklist.

Reason #5: It’s Perfect for LGBTQ+ and Nontraditional Weddings

As a gay wedding photographer and member of the LGBTQ+ community, I work with a lot of couples who are tossing tradition and creating their own rules. First looks are especially powerful in queer weddings where the concept of “walking down the aisle” may not look like the standard script.

Whether you’re both walking in together, doing a mutual reveal, or just want a private emotional moment before the formalities, a first look can be a beautiful part of that story.

Common Concern: “But Won’t It Ruin the Aisle Moment?”

Honestly? Nope.

You know that movie-magic moment when your partner sees you and tears up? That still happens. And sometimes, it’s even more emotional because the pressure is off. I’ve had couples cry during the first look and cry again at the ceremony—because emotions aren’t a one-time thing. You’re not “using up” your feelings.

You’re just letting yourself feel them without an audience.

Pro Tips to Make Your First Look Extra Special

Here’s where my photographer hat comes in. If you do go for a first look, a few quick tips:

  • Pick a private, quiet location. Not everyone wants their bridal party cheering 10 feet away (unless you’re into that vibe!).
  • Take your time. Don’t rush it. Breathe. Hug. Talk.
  • Consider writing notes or vows to each other. I’ve photographed couples exchanging letters during the first look, and it adds a deeply personal layer.
  • Don’t worry about posing. I’ll guide you if needed, but mostly I’ll let you be. The most powerful photos come from unscripted emotion.

The Bottom Line

A first look isn’t for everyone—but for many couples, it becomes one of the most treasured parts of their wedding day. It’s intimate, emotional, and it puts the focus back on your relationship, which is kind of the whole point, right?

As a Boston wedding photographer who’s photographed countless first looks—from waterfront elopements to historic city hall weddings—I can say with confidence: if you’re even thinking about doing a first look, it’s probably the right move for you.

Still Unsure? Let’s Talk

Every couple is different—and your wedding day should reflect you. If you’re not sure whether a first look fits your vision, I’d love to help you figure it out. Get in touch, and I’m happy to walk you through what it might look like at your venue, or share some real examples from past Boston weddings.

Contact me and let’s start planning a day that feels true to you.